Back with WHO

Hey blog hey! So unfortunately I have been without a computer for some months and therefore my lack of blogging is plaguing this page. However, I am back with a vengeance. I just finished watching the first episode of the 6th season of Doctor Who with my favorite man Matt Smith. I legitimately almost wet myself. THE ALIENS WERE SOOOOO SCARY!! And unlike the characters I can actually remember them which makes it worse for me. I already hate being alone. That just made it 50 times worse. I don't like those aliens. Others I am ok with like Silurians or Daleks but definitely not these creepers. Anyways, scary times. But watching that episode clears some things up.

Pale as the moon

---------------------------------------> I still despise that picture. Anyway. Remember Bee's post from yesterday? Well, it is also a proven fact that 60% of Seattlites deprived of enough vitamin D. So, sometimes when it is 36 degrees outside we will stand out on the front porch in skirts and t-shirts to soak up what little sun there is. And then return inside to soak up the heat...from the fireplace. P.s. I almost titled this post "pasties," as in "pasty white." Then I realized that it said pasties.

Help our poor vitamin D deficent souls!

So hey there hey! It's been quite some time since I, Bee, have written on this blog. For that I apologize. But hey, life goes on I suppose. So it's been raining in our great state almost continuously for the past 3 weeks. I feel it goes without saying that all of us here could use a day to dry out. So on this glorious Sunday the sun decided to shine and we are shut up in out house. Why you ask? Well the sun may be gracing us with its life giving presence but it's still 40 degrees outside. I feel like I belong in a Pemco commercial. In fact, as I write this I'm squinting.

Moment of Truth

It's official. We suck at writing on this blog everyday.

Prescription for addiction?

I have an addiction. Harry Potter. It's getting a little out of hand. I just read the seventh Harry Potter book (The Deathly Hallows!) and am now returning to read the fourth, fifth, and sixth (then probably the seventh again!) I might even read the first, second, and third. Darling sister and I started a Harry Potter Marathon. I believe this is where we will watch a Harry Potter movie everyday until the seventh (second half!) comes out, which isn't until July. This means there will be repeated movies. Oh yes... that is just what it means! We will be knitting ourselves Griffindor scarves, I am tempted to forge a Howarts letter and frame it on my wall, just to fool my friends, and, well, Severus Snape is my hero (next to Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger, of course.) I probably need help. Oh, did I mention Bee has a Harry Potter cookbook? She does. We cooked a magical dinner. Yeah, help.

April Fool's!

The dollar store lied to me. Phil and I bought silly string from the dollar store, and on the back it says "easy to use, easy to clean up!" Firstly, those things are not easy to use! Phil thought it was.... so I was covered in it! It blinded me! I was trying to spray mine back, but it would not work... :( so I lost the silly string war. :( Did I mention it was raining, and we were outside? Well, that was the case. Time to clean up! We tried the hose. No success. We tried brooms. Fail. We resorted to the primitive, yet productive use of our hands to pick up each individual piece of silly string. I think those words on the back were a big April Fool's day joke.

Sexy Sax man

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaoLU6zKaws&feature=youtube_gdata_player yes.

Bless you

About six-o-clock this evening I was hit with a sudden allergy attack. It got ugly very quickly. Sneezing, runny nose. The whole shabang. Luckily Emmy's boyfriend happened to be over and also got hit with this massive allergy. So here we are in the kitchen, to big snerds, pulling strange faces while trying to have a conversation and not sneeze on each other. We're gross. And awesome. And right now I have a bed covered in Kleenex and a computer that needs to be sanitized.

Babies.

I was holding a baby at church. This baby likes me. I had a baby eater try to take this baby from me. Obviously I did not sacrifice this darling baby to the baby eater. I believe this baby will be eternally grateful. Even though the baby eater was upset.

Sabbath

I have homework to finish. Yet I have been reminded that I should not do homework on Sunday. Therefore, I will leave my homework unfinished and not study for my test that is tomorrow. Also, I will tell Mr. Bare that it was against my religion to do this homework and study for this test, and I will automatically get an A because he is not allowed to fail me for my religion. Thank you.

Bee's joke

Bee: "If blood is thicker than water, then what is thicker than blood?"
Me: "mud. molasses. your skull."
Bee: "No. Fondue cheese!!"

Of course it's fondue cheese. Who wouldn't think of that?

English Lesson

The correct way of spelling "grateful" reminds me of the word "grapefruit."

Dear Emmy

Please Blog. We miss you.

What else do I have to do?

So here I am at 10:26 p.m. sitting in my closet (which is actually my tiny room which I call the closet) doing absolutely nothing. A logical person might go to sleep. Alas, I am not logical. I have ventured back into the state of Washington but have done nothing since my return on Sunday. I am just lazy and tired. And tired and lazy. However, I am getting motivated enough to have a bombin zoo date with some of my favorite people which of course includes my darling dear sister Emmy and my baby sister Sippy Sue. I'm sure a fun time will be had by all. And now I must bid farwell to you blog for I am going to sleep. Talk to you soon.

The sad story of a girl who has been home alone for 4 and a half hours and does not know what to do.

Hello, I am writing to you from my giant, comfy, black butterfly chair in my bedroom. My history textbook is lying open on the floor, beckoning to me to read it. My agenda is lying on the box next to me, with a list of things that should have been finished hours ago. Why isn't it finished? I will explain my day. Generally, I wake up at 5 a.m., and head off to early morning seminary. Afterwards, I go to high school for approximately 2 hours, and then drive home for a small break. Sometimes that "small" break tends to be long. Actually, that is pretty much always the case. However. As soon as that break comes to an end, I do hours of homework, mostly for my microbiology, disease in modern society class (that has about 3 weeks left!). Today was a different story. I woke up at 5, as usual. Before going about my morning routine, I checked the school district website and found out that, due to snow, we had a two hour late start. So I slept for 2 more hours, then got up with by darling baby niece. I drove to school at 9:30, went to two, shortened, classes, and drove home around 11. My niece was in need of some attention (not entirely, since there were plenty of people at home who adore her), so of course I gave it to her. Until about 4 o'clock. The rest of my family had left at 3:30- my parents needed a ride to the airport (have fun in Hawaii parents!), so my brother took them, and dropped Sydni off at a friend's house. Havanna left with her Nana at 4, at which time I took great interest in my television screen. Muppets from Space was on, and I was greatly intrigued. Dear brother went to a basketball game, so I made dinner for one (white cheddar pasta, thank you very much) and watched my film, along with iCarly (iSell penny tees) and plenty of episodes of Degrassi (The boiling point!!!!). At 7, I decided I should probably take to the tasks which I had greatly neglected, but as I walked into my room, my big chair and open laptop were far more interesting than was my neglected textbook(s)....Curse you modern technology.

The terror of nightmares that are so realistic they might in fact be real

Last night while I was asleep I had this dream, nay this nightmare, that I was with child. Yes I had a dream I was pregnant. While sitting in my History of Communications class I went into labor which even in dreams was the most painful things I've ever experienced. So we went to the hospital where I continued to be in labor for a solid 12 hours; when they discovered my baby (the sex of this child was unknown) was stuck I just left the hospital and went back to my History of Communications class where I finished the test I had left the day before. This dream was so realistic that when I woke up this morning I had to immediately feel my belly to make sure it was only a dream. According to my friends at California Psychics: To dream that you are pregnant, symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. Being pregnant in your dream may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal. Alternatively, if you are trying to get pregnant, then the dream may be a wish fulfillment. If you are not trying to get pregnant, but dream that you are, then it symbolizes fear of new responsibilities. There you have it friends. I am about to embark in a new goal/project/direction/idea and am just not ready to talk about it yet!

Our ever-lovely friends who embarrass us because we are clearly not as cool.

So I went to a place called Sky High yesterday. Basically it is the bounciest place you can imagine. Literally. I went with a couple friends, one of whom is about as athletic as I am. (OK, that was a lie. We should all know by now that athletics is pretty much at the bottom of my talents list. For this friend, it's about number 4.) The other friend, however, pretty much has it all. Athletics for her... is like higher than number 1 on her talents list. She's crazy. And good. So anyway, us three girls were the oldest people in this place (because I think it was everyone-under-8-years-old day.except for Kenna Melissa and me) and the staff had no one else to talk to unless they wanted to dial down their vocabulary a couple notches. As you might have guessed, these staff members (men) were in awe at Kenna's mad skill, because she was doing back flips off of the walls. Yes, the walls. Keep in mind, the entire room is a trampoline, even the walls. Normal people run up the walls, or jump sideways (and then fall into a miserable heap on the floor trampoline, because nothing good happens when you try to jump off the wall- even when it's a trampoline. I learned.), but Kenna was definitely doing back flips off the wall. And these staff boys were amazed. So... Kenna didn't like being the center of attention, so she tried to put me in the spotlight. I like spotlight, but not when I know for a fact that I will make a fool of myself. The boys expected me to be awesome, because I'm friends with Kenna. Well, we all know I'm awesome, just not at being flippy and cool on a trampoline. I failed. Miserably. I tried to do a back flip (I was under pressure!), but not off the wall, just on the floor tramp. As the guy said, "that was more of a head flip, try to actually jump first next time." I don't think my head left the trampoline the entire time. Needless to say, Melissa and I played dodge ball and threw foam balls at annoying children, while Kenna continued to unintentionally awe every boy in the room. Even the five year olds. I love Kenna dearly. :)

Happy Valentine's Day!

Jules Renard once said, "Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties."
I find this to be true on Valentine's day. The first thing I saw as I walked into the school was a woman wearing a massive wreath of ugly teddy bears around her neck, and a big line of boys that forgot to buy something sentimental for their love-dove, so are settling for an off-white, squished teddy bear that holds a heart saying "thinking of you." "Thinking of you?" Obviously that's a lie, otherwise they would have thought of something better to get their high school sweetheart. Anyway... none of this ties into my quote very well. Failed thesis.

Back to Valentine's day. So at school we did this tacky dress up day, where those who are "taken" wear red, those who are "confused" wear yellow, and those who are "single" wear green. It's supposed to be like a traffic light, if you didn't figure that out. So if you are desperate on Valentine's day, go searching for a person wearing green. Or if you are REALLY desperate, go for the yellow. Confused people need love too...? Then you can fall into a daze that is probably confused with love, and buy some tacky balloons, flowers, and cheap chocolates, and give them as items of affection to "the one." Or you could always go for the 25 cent conversation heart boxes, and stick it in the arms of a giant white and red teddy bear. That is always a hit among the infatuated.

So I just hard-core dissed this holiday, and in the process dissed myself. Anyone want to guess what I got my boyfriend for Valentine's day? Some big balloons, a card, and a decorated jar full of chocolates. So yes, I am among the tacky. And my brother just brought my mom a bouquet of flowers (which is rather cute, since it is his mother.) But whether we like to admit it or not, we are all sappy and tacky when we feel like loving. :) Happy Valentine's Day!

A shout out to my creative sister, who made her gift unique and adorable! A heart shaped pizza for the man in her life! (Which is not the dog named Copper, as she might claim. But is really a boy.)

HAHAHA

I'm in the process of deleting my Twitter account and came across all these hysterically funny things that have been said by yours truly. I had to put them somewhere before they are lost forever.

Anyone who belongs to the website "My Life is Twilight" makes me want to light myself on fire. They should all by eaten by tigers.

There's frosting dried onto the blinker in my car. Its disgusting but yet again I feel that says something about me and my eating habits.

Why is Kristen Stewart famous? She's all kinds of suck. What's she even famous for anyways? Having sex with mythical creatures? I'm sure a lot of people do that. I wonder if she knows vampires aren't real. Someone ask her.

I just found cookie crumbs in my bed...I feel this says something about me.

I think I have been abducted by aliens. They've implanted microscopic video cameras into my foot.

I just bought a cap gun so I'm running around like cops and robbers. I'll get that escaped convict!

It's all fun and games until Taylor Swift starts dating your celebrity boyfriend.

I just found a human tooth on the kitchen counter. I'm sure there is a logical explaination for this.

I hate sleeping with my door open. It makes it so much easier for someone to sneak in and slash me in the night.

I always knew I had superhuman powers! I have the power to stain a brand new shirt in under 1 minute.

When I move out I will watch movies on Friday nights. Anyone who tells me otherwise will be punched in the face.

I had salsa in my pants.

Our bathroom smells like someone caught a salmon and put it under our cupboard. Also the salmon has probably been there for awhile.

I just asked for something called 24 hour energy. I realized that those substances are what got Lindsay Lohan tossed in jail.

Sad that my to do list includes being a normal human. Sadder still is that it's probably the only thing that won't be achieved today.

It smells like mold and chicken enchiladas down here.

I have the smell of rich people all over me. I can't get it off.

Also, why do mexicans feel compelled to push their 6 year olds in strollers made for babies.

I love her but sometimes I feel visually assaulted by Lady Gagas wardrobe.

They keep playing Hannah Montana for these kids. I'm sure even sick kids have ear drums.

Thought for the day.

Holy Slackers

So, Bee has been home visiting from California for a week. As you might have guessed, there have been a conglomeration of funny happenings, yet for some reason we have failed to post them. For starters, I will direct you to the basis of our amusement (or mine at least).

www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtN1YnoL46Q

www.youtube.com/watch?v=stPsk1HsSj0

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLAaI95cIN4&feature=fvw



Mother, I assume you will read this because you are a dedicated follower. To prevent yourself from insanity, do not open these links. I warned you, so now hopefully I will stay alive.

What in theWorld??

BEEEEE! This new format is tripping me up!!!! I'M SO CONFUSED.

On a happier note, I myself plan to dominate the world this week. Not by wearing a humunga mustache.. (although I haven't put it out of my mind completely...) but by getting a drivers license! Yeah, you probably drive. But you aren't me! MUAHAHAH.

the joys of being funny

So my darling sister Emmy asked me to write something funny. As I was pondering what to write, I decided that showing you something funny might be better than writing something funny. After all a picture is worth a thousand words.

http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/wireless/Customer-Favorites_3AA/Item_Mustache-Mirror_VH4633.html

Yes my friends that IS what you think it is. Also, since we're on the topic of facial hair, why not help out mans best friend.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/homeoffice/pets/d5e5/

Make sure you read the description of this valuable product. And now you know what I spend a majority of my time doing. Which is funny. I have thusly fulfilled the requirement of writing something funny. Good day.

pouvre slipper :(

A travesty has occured. The cute little pom pom has fallen off my new slippers. :( What once was a big pom pom, has turned into a small lame one. Tragic.

Hot puppy.

This morning I got on Facebook and this picture was posted on my wall with the caption "hahahahahahahahahhahahaha this is the funniest thing I've ever seen. and that puppy is soooooooooooo cute."

Can anyone guess who might have put this on my wall? Yeah, you're probably right.

In Dublins fair city where the girls are so Pretty.

Oh Dingle, my new home!

HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
    "DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
    "What?"
    "Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

Protect your beardo.

http://www.beardowear.ca

I find this to be slightly amusing. Although I sadly cannot take credit for this ingenious invention, I applaud the person that came up with the idea. Well done.

Adventures in grocery shopping

Today I went grocery shopping. Woah Woah! Calm down you say! Don't get too crazy! I know. Ok well I did go shopping and I was the only white person under age 70 in that store. It was nice. Very vulnerable feeling. But nice. It smelled like flowers and organic foods. But it was lovely. The check out lanes had street signs above them and a mural was painted on the wall and I believe it was supposed to be what this area of California was supposed to look like. I have never seen that but I suppose if a mural is painted of it, it must be true! Murals don't lie.

Freeway Freeway.

Here I am in my new apartment sitting on my bed listening to the nice soothing sounds offffff.... THE FREAKING CARS THAT ARE BUZZING DOWN THE ROAD!!! Seriously, this apartment is sooooo loud. I might as well be sleeping under the 405 bridge except that it's warmer in here and probably smells a little better. But my apartment does smell like my dead grandfathers bathroom. It's a very distinct smell that I will always remember and has not reincarnated in my place. Oh well. Anyways, the amount of noise these cars make is a little absurd. For all you apartment shoppers I would recommend never buying an apartment on a busy road.

I will find my sock.

ACCIO SOCK!!

Elmer Jr. is no match for magic that comes directly from Hogwarts.